i can do that

I'm unemployed. But you know that already. I get on Craigslist everyday, and send out resumes and cover letters. I usually send on average about three a day. I don't follow through on any of them, and just sort of hope for the best with most of them. If I do happen to land an interview, I usually fall short in enthusiasm, experience, or I believe I'm over-qualified. I was, however, very excited about one particular job I applied for, and I felt like I would be the perfect fit. I knew they would be crazy not to hire me.

The job was as a character entertainer to go to children's birthday parties and perform singing telegrams. Hello?! I can do that.

The application process was pretty easy. I just had to fit into some measurement requirements for the costume, be ok with wear mascot suits (I'm still not 100% sure on that one), and be willing to make a fool of myself. I felt fine with all three of those, and got a call from Randy, the owner of "Happy Kids Entertainment" just two days after I applied.

The first step in becoming an entertainer, is shadowing one of the characters at a local party, then audition, then train. My shadowing assignment was with "Batman" at a child's birthday party in South Valley Los Angeles.

I brought my roommate, Mitch, along because he is also unemployed and kind of a wacky dude. The party was about seven miles from my house, and located about one mile from the prestigious Wilshire Country Club. The neighborhood seemed saturated with Latinos, and I wondered if Batman was going to speak Spanish. We were instructed to wait just a couple of houses away, and when we saw Batman we just follow him in, stay close to him, and try to remain unnoticed.

Batman showed up. He came running down the street and we followed him into the most amazing backyard party. It seemed like such a modest house, but the back yard was covered by a tent, filled with tables, chairs, a band, and at least 50 people. Batman immediately focused in the kids and clowned around like a true professional. We played parachute games, he did some magic tricks and made balloon animals for each child. All the while Mitch and I observed quietly, and I knew I could totally do this job, and be good at it.

Although Mitch and I tried to be inconspicuous, this was a party thrown in the Hispanic culture. We were bombarded with offers of food, beer, and tequila. We kept turning them down, even though we were starving, but they did not let up. We finally agreed to some bottled water. The mother of the "birthday boy" made us promise we would eat as soon as Batman was done with the show. She made is seem like she would be very offended if we didn't take her up on her offer. Needless to say, we came back after Batman was out of sight and pigged out on delicious, greasy party food.

Batman's energy at the party was intoxicating. Watching his energy, and seeing him sweat because he was trying so hard to make this little boy's birthday party the best ever was thrilling. Entertaining and making a fool of oneself is my forte. I know I can do what he did. Mitch, on the other hand, thought the job looked like torture and hated the idea of working with kids.

I called Randy the next day to set up an audition. I drove 15 minutes north to Panorama City to a modest house. Randy brought me to his backyard, where he has a shed full of every possible character costume you can imagine. He pulled out the head of a dinosaur (yes, like the head of a dinosaur mascot suit) and he said, "Try this on and see how you feel."

I put on that dinosaur head, and couldn't see anything, unless I looked out just one of the one inch size eye holes. My first impulse was to yank the thing off my head and give up. It was hot and dark, and I was afraid I would really hurt myself because I was almost blind. Randy told me to shuffle, move slowly, feel my way around, and I would be fine. I thought - yeah right. But he told me to clown around a bit, so he could see if I had "what it takes." Ha!

I used my big girl voice, acted as much like a dinosaur, and flailed about. Randy smiled and said, "Wow, you have a loud voice." Two words- THANKS MOM! I wore the head in the afternoon sun to see if I could handle the heat, and I realized that it wasn't that bad. I told Randy that I am totally game, and really want to get started right away. He told me he wanted me to be sure, because most people like the idea of entertaining, but then quit because they discover that it is some of the most intense work they've ever done. But me? I am up for it, and I want to prove to Randy that I can be the best Cinderella/Clown/Spongebob Squarepants the greater Los Angeles area has ever seen. HA! I can't wait to train for the job, and hope that I get more gigs then I can handle before I head back up to Skagway.

Look out, Los Angeles, it's about to get real wacky up in here!!